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Anil Thomas

Master NLP Practitioner & Gestalt Therapist

How to discover your self concept?

Choose a quality, capacity or attitude that you know is true of yourself and that you like. How do I know I am X? There are likely to be a number of aspects.

  • There is a simplified image or summary representation. This summary example includes the basic criteria for the other examples in the database

  • Database of examples and experiences that underlie it

  • The database examples might be visual, auditory or kinesthetic.

Important elements

  • A wide range and number of examples in different contexts, makes it more compelling.

  • Location – where you represent them, at a distance, up high etc

  • It can be simultaneous (all at once) or sequential (like a tape or book pages). Kinesthetic System Processing and Auditory System examples are more sequential. Having visual simultaneous representations allows you to have a large quantity of examples.

  • It can be in any modality – visual, auditory, kinesthetic. Feelings summarize data but are less effective at presenting specific detail

  • Associated (as though you were there) or dissociated. Associated examples are stronger and more compelling

  • There will be Submodality differences – color, size, volume, tone. Usually memories that are large, colorful, close etc will feel much stronger and more real and important

  • Aspects of time relates to continuity and reliability. Past examples tend to stay in the past. Future examples are predictive.

A Healthy Self Concept

  • Durability and reliability – you don’t want your self-concept to collapse and disappear at the first hurdle. A wide range and number of examples in different contexts, makes it more solid.

  • Accurately based on competence and backed by confidence. A big bright summary image of self with few examples to back it up creates overconfidence

  • It is responsive to ongoing corrective feedback. Strong self-concepts are more sensitive to feedback – you notice differences more easily.

  • It is unconscious and automatic – peak performance, flow state. Self-consciousness tends to interfere with effectiveness.

  • Connection – separations come from making comparisons between ourselves and others and noticing the differences

  • Free of Self Importance and Egotism.

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